Renewal Again

The Bishop is really pushing this Renewal Leave. He says, and I can't dispute him, that we are abnormally at risk for burnout. I've seen the data on our divorce rates, alcoholism/drug abuse rates, and all that jazz. Most of these issues arise because, plain and simple, we are the people who take on others' burdens, and have no one to share ours (and, with confidentiality rules, all of theirs) with. We are the people who are expected to count God's promises of the Kingdom as a substitute for income, but last time I checked, God doesn't write checks for our kids' college expense. We are supposed to be available, period. No partners in the practice to take the other three weeks of the month. All the time. My family has had 6 vacations cut short by deaths or other emergency situations, and one cancelled for the same reason. Growing up, another 8 or 9 were affected likewise. (My current practice in response to that problem is to go so far away that there cannot be any expectation of return.)
My current assignment is publicly spectacular. We take in members, our budget grows (we're almost $1,000 per week ahead of last year), we meet our obligations in full. By any measure, things have gone remarkably well. Then there's the private side. I am currently at the lowest income I have had since 1993. And the high was almost $70,ooo in 1998. Less than $50,000 in 2007 doesn't match up, and $9,000 of that is the expense account required to do the job. Churches like mine in our fair area average right at $67,000, so we are significantly behind. For the first time in my 23 years under appointment, I received the Christmas gift that the Annual Conference gives to the lowest paid preachers. Life without a secretary (for the first time since 1991) doesn't get it, either. Or the other staff members that make a growing church keep going. The last time I was the whole deal, I was 28 years old. I'm not that any more, not by a long shot. I am the pastor, the secretary, the receptionist, the errand boy, tables and chairs set up crew, sometime custodian, children's worker, sometime youth worker, Seniors group leader, preacher, choir member, evangelism worker, and so on. And I'm good at all of them. The only problem is that I'm also a father and husband, son and brother and uncle, and I haven't been very good at any of those over the last 19 months. And I have a good situation, because I get to see positive results for my work. Most of my colleagues make more money, and have more help, but don't have the things to show for their work that I do.
My Summer off in 1995 came at a good time. I had just about had it. Three years of fighting with old folks about the mission of their church is wearing. Especially when their notion is that the church's mission is to hold their hands until they die. I was about done, and needed that break. I hope that the Bishop is able to put through his program. It would literally extend the lives of some of my brothers and sisters in the clergy. But I'm not sure that an adequate clergy care program can stop at a quadrennial month to get your head on straight again. There are a lot of months in between projected Renewal months...