I am a patient man. I navigated teenaged years with two daughters. I have served eight churches, and over 3,000 elderly people in the retirement homes. I have served under eight District Superintendents and four Bishops. As I said, I am a patient man.
This condition is about to change.
It must be clearly understood: I have never, ever, not once in my life, spat upon money that I was about to hand to someone else. Never. Ever.
However, I have repeatedly, repeatedly, repeatedly been expected to extend my hand and accept money that has been coated in saliva by various clerks in multitudes of stores.
Apparently there is an epidemic afflicting those in the retail industry that causes one's fingers to be ineffective in picking up cash, and an accompanying notion that the only resolution to the problem is licking one's fingers. I'm sorry for your plight. I will donate to research on the problem. I will pray for you if you tell me it is a physical, psychological, emotional or even spiritual problem.
But I will no longer, ever, not once more, accept money from anyone who slobbers all over their hand before handing me said cash.
I will call your manager. I will, as calmly as possible, explain the problem. I will ask for different money from someone who has not just tasted herself or himself. I will propose that your manager send you to the restroom to wash your hands. I will explain that I will never, ever again shop in your store. And should I ever come in again, and be treated in this same disgusting manor, I will do everything in my power to see you fired.
Stop the spit! It is gross. It is disgusting. It is not in the interest of public health. And, first and foremost, I didn't spit on the money before I gave it to you. You shall not spit on the money before handing it to me!
Now then; I feel better.
Until the next time I have to go and buy something. And I will be watching! And dry!!!
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